The selection of a therapist is an important decision. You are allowing someone into your life and into the deepest crevices. There are basic questions:
What is the current situation?
How did you get there?
How will you make it through?
Sometimes it is situational (a divorce, a move, a death) and you are seeking a solution-based resolution to get you through it. Sometimes it is a replay of events (loss of relationships, anger eruptions, fear of competency and merit) and you wish to spot the cycle but don’t have the required skills.
Tis not like a pair of shoes nor perusing a menu. It’s a commitment and a development of a relationship. It has to fit and it has to suit your tastes.
Get a referral
The internet may work if you do your homework. Read credentials and licensing. Read orientation and areas of interest and specialty. Understand scheduling and fees. You do not want to start and then stop for surface reasons.
Ask those you trust
Ask someone, like a doctor or friend, although their need and connection may not be yours. It may be a lead. While their issues and experiences may be different, it is a personal suggestion and a more personalized starting point. Like a specific store or restaurant, the taste is yours.
Set up an initial contact
Whether this be an introductory call or questionnaire, it will give you a sense of the therapist’s level of empathy, insight, and availability. This is connectedness.
What do you want?
Sometimes we seek a problem and solution-focused set of sessions. Is this a therapist who set a short-term task and goal who will give you a plan as easy as 1-2-3? Sometimes we seek to change a pattern and want someone who will listen, not judge, and guide.
Try it out
Schedule an initial session or maybe two. Tis like a pair of shoes… there may be a better one. Or like a menu choice… two bites are more than enough. Some personalities fit better with others.
Look into yourself
If one or two don’t fit… it might be your reluctance or unreasonable goals and expectations.
Can you be open and honest?
Therapy only works if you feel safe. If you cannot be fully forthcoming, that takes time and the therapy can have its limitations.