Going through the stages of life is complicated. Some changes, even if we initiate or plan for them, bring disruptions we had not anticipated: a wedding, an employment change, a household move. There are also those occurrences which come upon us suddenly or without warning and can be totally disorienting: the illness or death of a parent or partner, a request for divorce, a traumatic event.
When we see patterns in our lives that are repetitive, we believe it’s apparent that the situation is due to something about “us,” versus viewing someone else or something else as the cause. We develop patterns of response and reaction based on our early experience and earlier situations we have faced. We truly do the best with what tools we have.
While a self-help book provides cognitive guidance, therapy walks you through the process and can address the bumps in the road. You join with the therapist in a confidential and safe setting to express the situation and sort through options and apply them moving forward. Fixing something or solving something is not always that easy.
With guidance, it may be easier to develop specific skills and strategies to help step through the situation, find more successful styles, or increase the repertoire of skills we have. You will have new tools to sort through and apply.